Bushism 6 of 43

“I don’t think we need to be subliminable about the differences between our views on prescription drugs.”  – Sep. 12, 2000

One of the classics.

Check out the new Bernie Madoff doll

Here’s the latest from HeroBuilders.com. It’s a Bernie Madoff action figure! You pull its string and it empties your wallet!

I’m still watching for the John Thain doll, but I hear they’re having trouble designing one that doesn’t have its head up its ass.

Bushism 5 of 43

“There may be some tough times here in America.  But this country has gone through tough times before, and we’re going to do it again.” – August 13, 2002

He did have occasional busts of eerie prescience.

Grow a spine, wimp

After telling Rush Limbaugh, the Eric Cartman of the airwaves, to “back off” yesterday, today Rep. Gingrey has discovered his inner groveler:

From ThinkProgress.org:

Rush, thank you so much. I thank you for the opportunity, of course this is not exactly the way to I wanted to come on. … Mainly, I want to express to you and all your listeners my very sincere regret for those comments I made yesterday to Politico. … I clearly ended up putting my foot in my mouth on some of those comments. … I regret those stupid comments.

The sniveling, groveling, pathetic mea culpa didn’t end there, either.  Check out this bit of spinelessness:

This morning — because of what he called “high volume of phone calls and correspondence” in response to his comments — Gingrey issued a retraction, declaring his loyalty to hate radio. “I see eye-to-eye with Rush Limbaugh,” he said, later adding that he, Sean Hannity, and Newt Gingrich were “the voices of the conservative movement’s conscience.”

Nice to see the Republicans have such strong, principled leadership.  Note to Mr. Gingrey:  You were right the first time.  Limbaugh should shut the fuck up, crawl back under his rock and choke on his Oxycontin.

That, or put his money where his fat, lying, bloviating mouth is and run for public office.  Show some real leadership for a change instead of being a pathetic, fat, worthless demagogue.

And if Hannity, Limbaugh and Gingrich are the “voices of the conservative movement’s conscience”, then God help them all.  They’re fucked.

Bushism 4 of 43

“My administration has been calling upon all the leaders in the – in the Middle East to do everything they can to stop the violence, to tell the different parties involved that peace can never happen.” – August 13, 2001

Speak! Good dog. Now beg.

Change has truly come to America.  Fat, lying dirtbag Karl Rove will now experience the true meaning of the word “subpoena”.

For the uninitiated, it’s Latin for “under penalty”.  If he doesn’t talk, he should go to prison until he does.

Karl Rove, fat lying bastard

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Karl Rove Subpoenaed By John Conyers: ‘Time To Talk’

On Monday, House Judiciary Committee Chairman John Conyers (D-MI) issued a subpoena to Karl Rove, requiring him to testify regarding his role in the Bush Administration’s politicization of the Department of Justice, including the US Attorney firings and the prosecution of former Alabama Governor Don Siegelman. The subpoena calls for Rove to appear at deposition on Monday, February 2, 2009.

Rove has previously refused to appear in response to a Judiciary Committee subpoena, claiming that even former presidential advisers cannot be compelled to testify before Congress. That “absolute immunity” position was supported by then-President Bush, but it has been rejected by U.S. District Judge John Bates. President Obama has previously dismissed the claim as “completely misguided.”

“I have said many times that I will carry this investigation forward to its conclusion, whether in Congress or in court, and today’s action is an important step along the way,” said Rep. Conyers. Noting that the change in administration may impact the legal arguments available to Mr. Rove in this long-running dispute, Mr. Conyers added, “Change has come to Washington, and I hope Karl Rove is ready for it. After two years of stonewalling, it’s time for him to talk.”

Separated at Birth?

I think Dick Cheney is really Davros, creator of the Daleks.  No, seriously!  The resemblance is uncanny:

Consider the similiarities:

Davros – Rides a wheelchair.
Cheney – Rides a wheelchair.

Davros – Created an army of remorseless fanatics bent on destroying the universe.
Cheney – Has Blackwater.

Davros – Started the Time War and destroyed his own civilization.
Cheney – Started the Iraq War and bankrupted his own nation.

Bushism 3 of 43

“And, most importantly, Alma Powell, secretary of Colin Powell, is with us.” – George W. Bush, introducing the wife of Colin Powell on January 30, 2003

Bushism 2 of 43

“They can get in line like those who have been here legally and have been working to become a citizenship in a legal manner.” – George W. Bush, Dec 20, 2004

President Obama’s To-Do List

Dear Mr. President,

Congratulations on your historic victory and presidency. We can say that before it even begins because everything you do will be historic. Expectations will be high, and you will undoubtedly be judged harshly by many, but don’t let that stop you from doing what needs to be done and making the tough choices.

Speaking of which, I have a few early decisions that I feel need to be highlighted. Consider them recommendations, if you prefer. I’m sure I’m not the only one making lists like this, but I’d just like to put in my two cents.

So, without further ado, here’s a short list of things I’d like to see you take care of in your first 100 days (some sooner than others):

1. Open an investigation into the activities of the Bush administration.  We have, for the past eight years, lived under the virtual tyranny of this corrupt, incompetent and degenerate crowd.  They have lied to us, started two unnecessary wars, tortured under the guise of “protecting freedom”, violated the public trust, and generally wiped their ass with the Constitution while blowing their noses on the Flag.  High crimes and misdemeanors doesn’t even begin to cover what they’ve done.  It’s a miracle they weren’t impeached and removed from office before now, but Bush and Cheney must be held to account for their war crimes.  For the sake of American credibility and honor abroad, this must be done.  Because if we let them go, if we let them get away with it, all our talk of freedom and equality and upholding the rule of law is nothing more than empty rhetoric.
2. Repeal the so-called “USA Patriot Act”. Desperate times often produce bad laws, and few are worse than this one.  What possible justification could there have been to write a law allowing the nation’s intelligence services to snoop the library records of American citizens?  What possible justification could there be to allow the FBI to conduct “roving wiretaps” on our nation’s telephone networks?  What possible justification is there to allow such self-destructive, unconstitutional, paranoid, reactionary legislation to pass?  This odious piece of legislative toxic waste should be removed as quickly as possible and consigned to the dustbin of history.
3. Disband Blackwater and other Mercenary armies. A sure sign of an empire in decline is the use of mercenary armies to fight wars and perform other functions traditionally reserved for legitimate military forces.  Blackwater is a national embarrassment.  It has deliberately exploited our nation during a time of crisis, all for love of money.  On Bush’s watch they have literally gotten away with murder.  They should be held accountable for their crimes, the company dissolved, its assets siezed and sold, and the proceeds distributed among the families of the 4100+ victims of Bush’s Blunder.
4. Close Guantanamo Bay. I see you’ve already begun.  Good job, mate.
5. Stop the Bailouts. We’ve already thrown billions of dollars of taxpayer money down the bailout toilet, with nothing to show for it.  Worse, none of the companies that asked for and got bailout money seem to have shown any sign of changing their ways.  You have a terrible choice to make, sir – keep throwing money at them, and watch them die out anyway, or let them die quickly and see what replaces them.  Either way it will hurt, and it will hurt bad.  But maybe if we stop mollycoddling these bloated dinosaurs, the ones that come after them will be stronger, smarter and better.
6. Stop talking about “clean coal”. Everyone who isn’t an industry propagandist knows it’s bullshit.  There’s no such thing as clean coal – never has been, never will be.  The recent disasters in the Tennessee Valley proved that.  Even if we can manage to clean it up at the power production stage, mining the stuff is still almost as destructive and polluting as uranium extraction, and that, sir, is saying something.  So stop pushing the notion of so-called “clean coal” and use the bully pulpit to push truly green energy such as wind, solar and tides.  If we’re going to fix the environment and develop green energy we’ve got to stop chasing the clean coal dragon.

Anyway, sir, as I’ve said, that’s just a short list.  I’m sure you’re busy, and so far you’re getting a good start cleaning the mess left behind by your misbegotten predecessor.  Good luck, and God bless.

Sincerely,

the Afrit